I have not seen gated communities outside of India and the US, so I can't really comment on your situation since you aren't living in either of those countries.
However, from what I have seen, the reason they are antithetical to civil society is because while they are designed to create a physical separation between the 'local' population and usually the more richer, perhaps ethnically different population inside, they are much more insidious in that they also create huge psychological separations. You get more and more insular and start thing of 'us' vs. 'them' (people who live outside). It's a vicious circle of elitism and separates people from participating in basic civic issues of the community (many of the gated communities have their own civil system, for cleaning, security, other issues that they don't have to worry about). And the less you have to leave the community, the worse the separation gets. Security is another issue - many times they offer the illusion of security rather than actual security (unless of course the community can afford multiple full time guards with 24/7 coverage, which some can, and that of course does make a difference). Personally, and from the communities I've seen, I would never live in them. I am specifically talking about the communities like the one in that documentary that I posted.
Obviously, if I lived in Somalia or something, I'd have to rethink that issue....so I am not really in a position to comment on places I have never been.